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Buy Me A Scooter

Know what I hate? When people bring young children to movies that no young child should see. Movies where people get killed, movies that make me scream, movies where people shriek and drown and don't have any eyelids. Movies where the dead wake and the good die young. What exactly about the title "Hellboy" makes you think you should pack up the toddlers and head to the multiplex, you dumbass?! I mean, I liked Hellboy, but I'm an adult, dammit!

Know what freaks me out? Preteen girls. With their freaky lowass bell-bottom pants and their braces and their weird little faces and their cell phones. Eek. The world is in trouble, folks. I have seen our future: it smells like too much perfume and it lies to its parents.

Know what I love? That today I passed the written test for my Minnesota motorcycle endorsement! Now I can drive a motorcycle (or, more likely, an over-50cc scooter) during daylight with a helmet on. Look out, world! Now...if only I had a scooter. Oops, hang on - I gotta pick up that hint I just dropped.

Posted April 9, 2004 5:50 PM | On This Day: 2006 2003



Supreme news on the bike front! I haven't been on my bike in 2 years, thanks for the inspiration. Nothing like it.

what I think is funny about this is that -ahem- that's the way *your* generation was too (I mean the pre-teen girls, not necessarily the hellboy thing)

I enjoy watching three of them walking together and the cycle of pony-tail flips (in sequence) as if to say, "hey, we're looking so CUTE together... except brittany - she has, like, a zit or something on her nose... oh well, *I* look cute anyway. +FLIP+)

congrats on the M/C permit. I've kept mine for the last 10 years sans bike for a reason! do they let you take a license test on a scooter?

If you take the safety course, be careful. my girl saw a woman go over the handle bars and tear up her face on the first day.