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Dead Man Walking

I'm not dead, MJ! I'm still here, blogging has just taken a backseat to the icy grip of stress around my upper body.

Currently crushing me:

The Lovenest. Why oh why is it so hard to get a house in order? I see now why June Cleaver had her hands full around the house, even after The Beav went off to school for the day. It's harder to mesh the lives of two adults than I originally thought. Especially when one of the adults pretty much had a house full of stuff to begin with. The thing is, I'm a creature of habit. I like order. And really, since about March, my life has been long on romantic thrills, but short on order. As we speak, I sit typing in a room that is still full of boxes, with nails that haven't been manicured in over two weeks, near a kitchen that needs groceries, in a house that needs cleaning. And organizing. And painting. And bookshelves from IKEA. Laugh if you will, but it stresses me out. And lest you think I'm a diva I do my own nails, thankyouverymuch. I just haven't had the bloody time. And I hate that!

Future Wedding. I need to point out that this is self-imposed stress. No one else gives a shit, but I can't think of what we should do. J's cool with anything as long as it's personal and sincere. I agree, and I also want something unique. And fun. And not so much money that it breaks the bank. Currently at the top of the list is running away, getting married, then coming home and having a big party. The only bummer about that is that then Mopsa wouldn't be able to marry us, which is the current plan. So, maybe just something real small, with a party after? Argh! (Don't get me wrong, I'm deliriously happy to be marrying the perfect person for me. It's only the "what should we do" part that's freaking with my head.)

Migraines. I had another one last night. That makes about 4 in as many months. This is not good. I thought I had them under control, but they appear to be back with a vengeance. Ironic, considering I've quit smoking and damn near given up drinking, too. Could it be that hard livin' was good for me?!

Work. I'm busy, which is good. But, I'm taking on too much of what's going on personally. I work for what is essentially a startup. That means headaches and heartbreaks on a daily basis. Which I need to learn not to bring home.

Tetris Worlds. I've been playing it so much, I dream about it at night. I'm pretty sure that attempting to get to level 7 this weekend may have contributed to a migraine, as I gripped the controller and stared, unblinking, at a TV screen for hours on end, pausing only to hurl insults and curse words at Jack or Bill when they kicked my ass.

Italy. Have I mentioned that J and I are taking a trip to Italy at the end of September? Two weeks in Tuscany, one of which will be spent at a family friend's place. But we haven't booked the flight yet. Or planned our itinerary. And I haven't listened to our Italian phrases CD. I don't have a good travel pack. I think I need better shoes for walking around that are also vaguely fashionable. What can I pack that won't wrinkle? Ack!

Life. There's just too much to do sometimes. Cookie desperately needs a car wash, since I don't have a 401(k) I need to pay attention to saving for retirement, should I be investing, I have to remember to set up that emergency fund once we get back from our trip, I really need to call the Chiropractor or find something to do about these migraines, I want to be running 3 times a week, how can I fit Yoga into all this, I need to read this magazine for work, that magazine for pleasure, what groceries do we need, dear God my legs need shaving, my little sister leaves for college tomorrow do I have time to see her, I need to write more poetry, I'm trying to phase myself out of the board of directors I serve on but they really don't want me to go, I really need to find that GRE book for Buddha, can we fit a road trip to IKEA in before Italy, there are at least two babies that need booties soon, I really need to finish that blue sweater, when can I make it over to Needlework to do that?

Okay, so I'm a freak. Fine.

Tomorrow I'm going to tell you all about my weekend in Iowa, which was super duper NOT STRESSFUL.

Posted August 18, 2003 7:25 PM | On This Day: 2006



Ok...all of your loyal readers need you to do one thing for us, like RFN, ok? Are you ready? ...Breathe...

There. Doesn't that feel better?

Don't let all the little things get to you, most of them aren't that important, so what if your room with the computer has boxes and Ikea shelves, keeping Migrains and heart disease at bay are way more important then some boxes in the corner.. ok, thats my advice..

I think you need a stiff cocktail and a thick honey-do list. And stop stressing out! Stinker....

Don't you realize that your first priority is the blog, ALWAYS THE BLOG!!!

Hang in there. It's always darkest just before they turn on the lights.

P.S. Do you have a good chiropractor? My best friend just opened his own practice a few months ago and he is really good. He offers a lot of alternative medicine stuff as well.

Whew! You're back. At last, all is right in the world again. I know where to score some xanax if you need it. But actually, might I suggest a professional massage? Maybe a little "me day" at the spa? Does wonders babe.

Sounds busy.

Tuscany huh? You HAVE to go to the Cinque Terre. It is an amazing area. 5 little towns nestled on the Mediterranean, along (you'll love this) Poet's Bay. If you go to the Tuscany region and don't do this hike, you will forever hate yourself. Finishing at sunset is probably magical, I started the hike at sunrise, and walked stunned for half the hike. If you want more info, let me know.

Shrink Lee says, have you scheduled in relaxation time, and actually followed through?

wow, that post just about stressed me out. I have to agree with GSeven though. Blog first, stress later.

Actually, now that I think about it, Tetris should be #1, blog #2.

Sucks about the migranes though.

If you run away to get married I will run after you. I'm just sayin.

Have ordination certificate - will travel.

ack! and i thought i was stressed! at least you're stressing about good things like getting married and going to italy! good luck finishing everything! IKEA is the answer to all the world's problems